Root Beer Kegger!?


No, this is not an April fool’s joke! I just ran across an article on MSNBC about cops busting a teens’ root-beer kegger party. The party was held by a high school student who wanted to show that teens don’t always drink alcohol at their parties.

Nearly 90 breath tests were done, and officers even searched locked rooms for hiding teens. Did they find a clown making balloon animals hiding in the basement?

Yeah, I get it, police were trying to protect students from driving under the influence. Definitely needed. But after the first 50 or so breath tests don’t you think they would have figured out what was going on? The only high the teens had was a sugar buzz… though some may have been impaired by being gassy and bloated.

I would have particularly enjoyed the root beer float bong! Dude! I just got a wicked brain freeze! Cannonball!

What’s next? I can see it now… cops bust in on Amish teens sipping from red plastic cups… I knew they were wild. A butter-milk kegger bash. Mmmm… so rich and creamy! Look… Hezekiah has milk collecting in his budding neck-beard. Co-ed mingling… buggy drag racing… busted… let’s party like it’s 1899!


Explore posts in the same categories: justice, wacky

2 Comments on “Root Beer Kegger!?”

  1. Amanda Says:

    That is AWESOME! There is a documentary that I watched once (I have no idea why I watched it…) about Amish teens on their “rumspringa.” Which if you didn’t know, is when they are temporarily allowed to go buck wild for a period of time to see if they want to partake in the outside world, or stick to Amish. Made me think of that when you were talking Hezzikiah butter milk bongs. I think it was called Devil’s Playground or something like that…not sure…I just know the title had “Devil” in it…hehe!

    There have been RA’s on the substance free floors here at ISU who have had root beer keg socials…never been busted before though…sadly…that may have provided some entertainment!

  2. We had a Root Beer keg at a recent event with our youth group, and we sure did have the cops come by. They didn’t do any breath test, maybe since we where all on church property…

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